Vicki Mansfield, mental health accredited social worker: I often talk with parents about two things: 'the shoulds' and 'comparisonitis'. So what I call comparisonitis, because it comes up often in my conversations with new parents, because there is that state of change and transition and adjustment. And so there can be this pressure that might be being felt by 'Oh I should be doing this, I should be doing that'. So, I think the comparisonitis is when it gets quite big and intense. And it's quite outward focused. So it's this balance I think of finding connection and reassurance, but keeping an eye out for when we might be getting caught in comparisonitis, or 'the shoulds' are getting bossy and really starting to impact our mental health sometimes or our wellbeing. It's recognising that it is absolutely hugely important source of validation and support to connect with others. And to be real and brave in our conversations with others. 'Cause I think that helps us then have conversations about that are about the good, the bad and the ugly. So it's the nature of the conversations that will impact, in some ways, but it also is about how we might be turning that inwards. Say for example, we're caught in some of that comparisonitis - we might have a chat with a friend, then we might go home and think 'Oh her baby's sleeping through... Why isn't my baby sleeping through? What am I doing wrong? Oh, is there something wrong with my baby?', so you start doing this questioning and it goes back and forwards, it becomes this real back and forth worry, really. And so that's when I think the comparisonitis can start to overwhelm if we notice it's getting louder.